User blog:Dorkpool/Creepypasta Riffs: The True Jeff the Killer Story??
Ah, Jeff the Killer. He's considered by many to be the worst Creepypasta character and story, yet he remains incredibly popular, and has spawned many crappy rip-offs. Like the story I'm going to Riff, "The True Jeff the Killer Story??" (Yes, there are question marks. I have no idea why) So, let's go to sleep and Riff this bitch! Many great stories about outlaw Jeff the killer HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! '' become distorted and transformed into a being that is nothing like the actual person in question. Jeff the kid was nothing like the story suggests ''(Narrator): In truth, Jeff the kid was actually mentally retarded. So never mind my previous statement about him being nothing like the story suggests. but many believe it. One such story was about the modern psychopath: Jeff the killer. His story on the web changed his actual involvement in the world and how he acts. People love, hate and are generally scared of this psychopath from the story Yes, because a Joker rip-off from a crappy story is scary. 2Spooky4Me! that brought him to the main stream eye. Nobody knows, however, that this story is a lie. The original “Jeff the Killer” story was fake? Gasp! What other insights and truths will you reveal? That water is wet? '' He is more than a depressed teenager who goes crazy for some reason; he is more than what the fans of him say. He is one of the greatest killers ''HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! and nobody knows his true rise to this state. Except for an old friend of his! When Jeff moved into the big city with his family, he couldn’t be happier. For years he had to deal with being schizophrenic and having everyone in the old country tease him for his illness. Yes, because mental illness is hilarious! His parents had to move to the city because his father got a job working for the NYPD and he needed to be stationed there. Jeff’s mother reluctantly agreed, only because she knew a psychiatrist that could help Jeff with his illness. Jeff looked outside the window as they passed the town border and entered New York. Jeff has never seen such a sight before of the bustling streets and neon lights. Jeff made a hand gesture to get Samuel to come over and see. Jeff never had a friend or a sibling before so he made some of his own up. (Jeff): What’s that, Samuel? Kill my friends and family? Collect string in boxes? Jeff’s parents are happy about Jeff using his imagination but are also disturbed that he is thirteen and still has imaginary friends. The apartment they moved into was on the Brooklyn side, which is the side that Jeff’s father was stationed at. They all needed to unpack all of their gear then go straight to bed as the next day Jeff has to go to school and his dad was on the beat. Jeff’s bed was a fresh clean mattress while his parents had to sleep on the couch bed until their room was fumigated. Jeff was tossing and turning all night because he was experiencing a nightmare about the next day at school. (Narrator): He was at school in his underwear. The dream started off well as Jeff walked into the school with people smiling and welcoming him. His moment of joy was interrupted as a jock from the eleventh grade came up to him to pick on him for his schizophrenia. (Narrator): Of course, everyone called the jock an asshole for picking on a kid with a mental illness. The ones that welcomed him from the door turned around and pointed at him. They were all laughing and calling him a weirdo. His imaginary friend, Samuel, stood beside him. He looked at Samuel, who just said, “I’ll take care of this” Jeff closed his eyes for a split second to only open them to see all of the people who made fun of him hanging on the lockers and railings of the stairs by their intestines. Well, Samuel is pretty useful. Jeff turned with quick haste to Samuel, who was at the end of the hallway. Jeff asked why Samuel did it and Samuel just chuckled. “You’re the one that did this.” Jeff looked down to see a bloody knife in his hand and blood on his white hoodie. Samuel smiled at him. Jeff looked up and smiled back. The next day at school was not as bad as Jeff predicted it to be. Other than a fight which resulted him going to the principal’s office. The principal said it wasn’t good for Jeff being at this school for one day and already knocking someone out. (Jeff): But it was a new record! '' The car trip home after he has been suspended, his mother asked him why he did it. He looked up at her and broke his depressing silence by saying that Samuel told him to. His mother didn’t want to hear another word of it and explained that as of tomorrow he will be seeing Doctor Rosland to help with his condition. For the rest of the day, Jeff walked around the apartment with a depressing feeling building inside of him. All he could think of was going to sleep. This sleep had another horrifying dream. ''Did it involve Satanic Sonics or a tall guy in a suit? He saw a man in a dark room with a light shining over him. Jeff crept up to the man because there was no other point he could see. Jeff tapped the man on the shoulder to ask him where he was. The man turned around to show Jeff his disfigured face. Jeff leapt back when he saw the scar on his left ear. The exact same scar that Jeff has. “Oh look, see this boy? This is your life!” The man raised a knife to strike down Jeff. Before the knife hit him, he woke up to the crashing sounds in the kitchen. He rushed out of his room to see his father battling with somebody with a knife. The knife man stabbed Jeff’s father in the neck where the Jugular is while his father pushed the man down onto the floor. Jeff saw his mother unconscious and he decided that he would protect his family. He grabbed the knife from the man and started stabbing him in the heart. STABBED THROUGH THE HEART, AND YOU’RE TO BLAME! JEFF, YOU GIVE CREEPYPASTA A BAD NAME! Jeff shed tears as he did this, because he couldn’t stop until the man stopped breathing. Jeff was exhausted from this stabbing and rushed over to his father. He tried to help his father but by this time, his pulse had stopped. Jeff turned to his mother who screamed out: “Jeff…You killed, You killed two people, including your father! Oops. That is it Jeff, I cannot take care of you anymore!” She promptly picked up the phone and called 911. (Narrator): This was a problem, since his mom forgot the number. Jeff was arrested the next day. He was being taken away screaming on how his mother should help him. His tears of sadness were real; his screams were ones of terror. He was sentenced to five years of imprisonment by the law. So Judge Dredd sentenced him? This sentence lasted longer due to the violent outbursts of Jeff. He had used a pipe to smash another inmate’s face on multiple occasions. He has put poison in some of the meals when it was his turn to serve them. He was constantly put in solitary confinement only to be brought out and put back in again. Every time he was placed in solitary confinement, a psychiatrist came to visit him to tell his mother how he has progressed with his schizophrenia. One of these sessions, the psychiatrist, Doctor Comswell, told his mother that he is no longer referring to Samuel anymore. (Narrator): Now he referred to his hallucination as Liu. Everyone agreed that was a strange and stupid name. Comswell went on to say that he is developing a new personality to be his main one. Jeff’s mother looked through the one sided window to see her son in the corner of the room, looking at her with a deathly look. Time passed when Jeff had to be moved to the adult prison. Doctor Comswell said that he shouldn’t be afraid of this as he will be there as well. Jeff smirked a little bit then raised his head. “Who said I was afraid?” Trust me, Jeff, you will be when you have to take a shower. His time in the adult prison was running smoothly in his opinion. He made himself the most dominate by finding the dark secrets of other inmates and threatened to expose them all. Jeff carved a smile into his face using a spoon with enough pressure. That is incredibly stupid. His reason for doing it was to prove to everyone he was happy now. He said he will always be happy with who he is from now on, no matter the mistakes he has made. His sentence was increased to life because of numerous incidents. The main one being during a conjugal visit from his mother, he leapt from his chair and wraped his hands around her neck. As the mother was spluttering with her last breaths, Jeff was saying something so horrifying with the deepest of angers anyone would ever hear. “This is what you wanted! You wanted me to be happy, so here I am, HAPPY!” Jeff’s transformation into Pharell Williams was complete. The guards came in when the final spasms the mother’s body signified her passing. On his twenty fifth birthday, Jeff fooled a guard to come close to him so he can grab the guard’s chest to smash into the bars hard enough to crack a rib and puncture his heart. As the guard was howling in pain, Jeff grabbed the keys to unlock his cell. He dropped the keys next to the now blood soaked uniform of the officer as he picked up the guard’s night stick. He started to walk to the exit of the prison when guards with pistols came around the corner. They demanded that he put his hands up. Jeff did not comply so they shot him in the legs. He was still standing after the shots were fired and started to chuckle. Damn it, story, you’re making the original “Jeff the Killer” story seem intelligent and well-written. He looked up and said to them. “I will never be sad again. Instead, I am happy.” He lunged at them flailing the nightstick into their bodies as they kept firing shots. The bullets hit his limbs but he kept going about his way. He shuffled to the front door of the prison until he turned around and started shuffling to Comswell’s office. His shadow invaded the window on the door as three subtle knocks were heard. “Thanks for making me who I am.” (Comswell): Oh, no problem. Have fun, you psychopath! '' A man went to visit Comswell's office at the prison where the greatest breakouts took place. He visited to pay His respects and to find some notes on a few patients that were transferred to him. This is where the notes where found on Jeffery and his real story. ''(Man): Wow, these notes seem ludicrous and stupid. Many of the mans patients have claimed to have seen a man that looked like Jeff, and they always say that he enjoyed pain the same way that Jeff does. So Jeff’s a masochist? The man found one last note, but it wasnt writen in Comswell's writting, it was barely legible, but what it said was: “I heard you the other night. They want me to go to sleep. You will never make me sleep! Everyone thinks I have no redeeming qualities but I actually do. I am happy for the first time in my life. Actual happiness. You can’t take that away. Not now. Everyone wants me to go to sleep. I will make them go to sleep.” So that’s why he says it! Still stupid as hell. END RIFF This seems to be a Hydra (HAIL HYDRA) of crap. For every plot hole this story tries to fix, two more take its place. Why and how is he impervious to pain? Why isn't he just in a sanitarium? What did Samuel have to do with anything? Who's Jeff's friend? I don't know, and the story doesn't see fit to rectify that. However, it did try to and, and kind of did, explain some things that weren't made clear in the original story (why he says "Go to sleep", why he went nuts, etc.) It still sucks though. Now, is this story as bad as the original "Jeff the Killer"? I actually think it's a bit worse. "Jeff the Killer" was actually much more well written. It's still crap, but it's marginally better crap. Point is, this story is garbage. So, what do you guys think? Is this story good? (Answer: Nope!) Was the Riff good? Do you wish Samuel would kill me? Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Category:Blog posts